i tell you the adventures never end. wednesday after work i had to run the backpack i borrowed for my arizona trip back to my friend for her trip to disney. when i got home i decided to get the few cups and bags out of my car and put them in the dumpster. so i grapped my keys and the garbage and tossed them in the big green dumpster next to my apartment. yes, i tossed everything in my hands, keys and all. i've done weird things with my keys before, locking them in the car, locking them in the car with it still running, leaving them in the outside of my apartment door all night, putting them in the freezer, etc. i have key issues and i got it from my mom.
so luckily my apartment complex just said no more outside furniture so a nice sturdy wooden bench was next to the dumpster. i dragged it over and climbed up. i could see the stuff i threw in and figured my keys were under that. i got a flashlight from my car, that wasn't locked but my apartment was and my roommate was mia. i was able to reach the garbage i put in, moved it and saw my keys, but i couldn't reach them. i needed a hanger. i thought about asking my neighbor who is a library patron, but his car wasn't there. so i hauled myself over the dumpster edge and made sure to land on a big black bag. this knocked the keys down and wouldn't you know it rained the two days prior and there was lots of cold, gross, water in the bottom. and where do you think my keys fell? oh yeah. at this point my neighbor came home. i'm hoping he doesn't see me in the dumpster. luckily he is on the phone and doesn't notice me. i threw the flashlight on the ground and put my hand in the muck. i got the keys and threw them on the ground. now how to get out. i'm a big girl and my upper body strength is lacking. but the thought of being stuck in a dumpster was enought incentive to pull myself out of the stinking container.
i got the door opened, washed my hands, my keys, my flashlight, the doorknob and light switches i touched and changed my clothes. my roommate arrived home 10 minutes later, perfect timing. what i learned: the clicker on my keys still works, i do have some upper body strength, and put your keys in your pocket before you put things in a dumpster. plus i got a funny story out of it.
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OMG!!!! wow... i don't know any one with a real dumpster diving story, thats awesome! i know it probably sucked but hey like you said, you got a great story about it. you so have to tell everyone at the feb bday party!
ReplyDeleteYou are hysterical!
ReplyDeleteI missed this wonderful story.
ReplyDeleteAnd I thought when you said dumpster diving, you just found some neat piece of furniture in one to take home. Only you could mean it so literally :)
ReplyDeleteBeth, girlfriend...we totally need to join some group or something about the key thing. I have done the keys in the fridge thing (and also ice-cream in the cabinet). You know what that says about us? We have too much good information up in our brains to waste space for things like keeping up with keys, purses,paperwork, etc.
ReplyDeleteAlso, dumpster diving!! Have you ever done this "just for fun", hehe? I'm totally being serious...maybe I'm outing myself but I LOVE to do this when the students are moving out of town.
Two things about dumpster diving (don't mean to highjack your blog!) :
That nasty water stuff at the bottom? We call it "dumpster juice".
and a short story :
My aunt used to love to dumpster dive with me and one time we were digging through some apartment bins (the kind with the sliding doors on the side) and my aunt found this great vacuum cleaner, the long tubular floor kind with the long hose that attaches to the wand. (You know, Electroluxe style) For some reason the electrical cord that went to it unplugged from the machine itself (like a computer electrical cord). We are not squeamish so my aunt and I were actually IN the dumpster. She handed me the vacuum and set to work trying to find the cord when a guy came down the apartment building's steps and toward the dumpster,with bunch of junk in his hand. I tried to alert my aunt that someone was coming, but really...dumpster diving was much of a zen thing and she didn't hear me. The guy was obviously surprised to find someone IN the dumpster..but not as suprised as my aunt, who just cheerfully said "Oh hi, Mr.(something). Is that the cord to the vacuum?!" He nodded yes, gave it to her and after a few more moments of chit chat he went back inside. ---Turned out the guy was her supervisor for the new position she had just graduated to at the UF Shands.